Skin color


Being a good person doesn’t depend on your religion or status in your life, your race or skin color, political views or culture. It depends on how good you treat others.”

I am tired of being defined by the superficial characteristics that provide others comfort because they know which box to put me in.

I was born a certain way—and I have always believed sometimes contrary to those around me that the variety of skin shades is beautiful and something to celebrate.

The truth is, the topic of race, still makes a lot of people feel uncomfortable—they don’t want to talk about it, fearing that they may be seen as prejudiced.

But more importantly, most people don’t want to truly acknowledge their own thoughts and feelings regarding their skin color or that of others.

It makes people feel edgy, as if talking about race is wrong to do, yet discussing racial differences is the only way that we can understand one another and squash any lingering prejudice or false beliefs, once and for all.

Honestly, I haven’t ever given a lot of thought to my skin color, because I don’t see it as something that I’m proud of, but it’s also not necessarily something that I feel condemned by either.

It just is.

It seems there is and will always be a standard by which we are judged.

Do I act white?

Am I feminine enough?

Am I motherly enough?

Am I adulting well?

who I am is not defined by the color of my skin.

If I can be described by any color it’s in the flush of rosiness of my cheeks when I am excited or blushing and in the deep blues of my eyes, as they swim with desire when I am looking into the eyes of my lover.

These colors say something about who I am and what kind of heart I have.

The reality is, the depths of my soul can’t be defined by the fact my great grandparents came from Finland, Sweden, and Germany.

My soul is a collection of my dreams and the thoughts held within the private sanctions of my mind.

It’s in my desire to make the world a better place and to help as many individuals as I can.

I am unique because, regardless of skin color, there is no one else quite like me in this world.

And that is what not only truly defines who I am, but who we all are.

  1. I am not a color, and I am not a place
  2. we should accept our ethnicity despite social views
  3. History should not identify me
  4. I should not be distinguished because of my physical appearance






Abilene Paradox


Have any of you been part of an Abilene Paradox? Do any of you  know what an Abilene Paradox even is?

An Abilene Paradox is when a group of individuals agree to a course of action based on the theory it is best for the group, despite going against the preferences of members of the group. This occurs when individuals feel their objections are not strong enough to support changing the minds of others in their group. Commonly referred to as “rocking the boat”.

Here is the story I heard, that made me think, “Hey, this happens to me a lot!”

Picture a hot and humid Sunday on a July afternoon in the small town of Coleman, Texas. The temperature is 104 degrees – in the shade. A mother, father, their married daughter and son-in-law are sitting on the outdoor porch playing dominoes.

The father suddenly exclaims, “Why don’t we all get in the car and drive to Abilene and have dinner in the cafeteria there?” The son-kn-law thinks to himself, “Abilene? That’s 53 miles away in this dust and heat and the car air conditioner isn’t working as it should.”

But his wife, the daughter, chimes in,“That sounds like a great idea. How about you, dear?” she asks her husband. Since his preferences are obviously out of step with the others, he slowly responds, “Sounds OK to me, but does your mother want to go?” He is hoping she will say No. The replies, “Why not, I haven’t been to Abilene in a long time.”

So they all pile into the old Buick and off they go to Abilene. It is brutally hot, the wind is blowing stifling hot air full of dust and the air conditioning is faulty. They arrive in Abilene after an hour and a half uncomfortable ride.

The cafeteria food is filling but nothing to write home about. Three hours and 106 hot miles later, the family is back in Coleman, sweating and exhausted.


The son-in-law says, sarcastically, “Great trip, wasn’t it?”

His mother-in-law replies, “To tell you the truth, I really didn’t enjoy it that much and would have liked to stay home. I just went along because the three of you were so enthusiastic about going. You all pressured me into it.”

The son-in-law couldn’t believe what he heard. “What do you mean, ‘you all?’ I didn’t want to go; I only went to satisfy the rest of you.”

His wife looked shocked. “Hey, I just went along to keep the rest of you happy. You three were the ones who wanted to go.”

Then her father entered the conversation. “Well, I never really wanted to go to Abilene. I just thought you all might want to go; that you were bored just playing dominoes here. I would have preferred to stay home and eat the leftovers in the icebox.” (outdated term for refrigerator).

They all sat back in silence. Here they were, four reasonably sensible, intelligent people, who of their own volition had just taken a 106-mile trip across a godforsaken desert in furnace-like heat and a dust storm to eat unpalatable food at a hole in the wall cafeteria in Abilene, and none of them had really wanted to go in the first place. In fact, they had done the opposite of what they really wanted to do.


So, have you ever encountered an Abilene Paradox?

We should just speak our minds!


Nine things I just cant handle

Image Everyone has things that they Just cant handle and probably never will be able to…..This is my list. And some of these topics may be gross to some or might make some people mad, im sorry. These are my feelings and the “problems” that bother me.


1) Nose picking

Like come one you cant grab something to blow your nose with? You don’t look attractive you just look plain nasty.

2) Farting in public

I understand that this is a natural process, I am a CNA after all, but somethings need to be done IN PRIVACY. The whole world doesn’t need to be involved in your bodily functions.

3) Left over marks on the toilet seat

“If you tinkle on the seaty please be a sweety, and wipe it off” Honestly how hard is that?

4) Things not put away in there place

I may not be very good at cleaning, but I have a spot for everything and if it doesn’t go back in its spot I get very agitated. I feel like its not that hard to put clothes away or put things in the garbage or every just putting the house phone back on the charging dock. Its just the little things that can help keep places clean. so, just do it.

5)I hate being told that I’m young so I dont understand or that my life is so much easier.

I get told constantly at work that everything is easier for be because I’m younger then them. Well, its not. Lifting people and everything else I do puts just as much strain on my body as it does theirs. Also, I get told by a lot of people that my “life” is easier because I’m younger. Its not. Just because I don’t have kids, or I’m not married, doesn’t mean things are easier. I go to school full time, I work part time, and even though I still live at home I still have bills, and I still have to support my self In certain ways.  I still have stress like everyone else, and I still struggle day to day like everyone else.

6) Pressure on women to be a certain size

I think it is absolutely crazy who our society today puts pressure on women to be a certain size.  Back in the day if you were “plump” you were known to be wealthy and that you had money to eat. Now, you known to be fat and lazy. Just because you aren’t a size one doesn’t mean your lazy or fat, some people who are bigger are really fit.  Yes, some aren’t but it doesn’t mean you are any better then someone else.  Also, to all of the women/ girls out there who are the size one, I understand some of you can not help it, some of you can not gain weight. I also understand it doesn’t mean you are unfit. So, If your a women and you healthy, you workout, why, why, why, does it matter what damn size you are. If your happy that is all that matters.

7) Judgment on other people

I know I catch my self doing this some times and I am working on it, but the part the bothers me the “most” is when your at work or out in the store or something, and someone comes up to you and tells you that “your doing something wrong”, “your going to hell for having tattoos”, blah blah blah. ITS NOT YOUR LIFE. So, why do you care!? Am I hurting you? Am I pushing my feelings/ religious feelings on you? No. So, leave me the hell alone, leave other people alone and mind Ur own damn business.  Now, where I live and where I come from the people that are doing the most judging are the people who are religious. So, for you religious people, keep this is mind.

The bible says not to judge another many different times through out the bible. There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor. James 4:12

8) Bullying

This is the reason for many of our problems in our country. Kids bullying kids, Adults bullying kids, Adults bullying adults. What is the purpose? I get that some people get a certain type of enjoyment out of bullying other people, but what they don’t understand is that bullying causes problems. Bullying makes everyone snap eventually. So, if any of you out there want to make the world a better place, like I do, It can honestly, in my opinion, start with just being more kind to others.

9) Not putting up a new roll of toilet paper

In my house we have this basket that holds any where from two to three toilet paper rolls at a time. So, In my house if you don’t put a new roll on I want to scream at who ever did it because there is absolutely no reason for it.  If your out in public and don’t have access to put a new roll on its quite understandable.